Tuesday, Dec. 23, 2003 - 9:51 a.m.
Greetings,
It’s the day before the day before Christmas. And I’m working. What a drag. Sort of. It’s like a ghost town here, but a quietly jolly one. I’m staring at my poinsettia plant at the moment (and typing because I don’t have to look at the keys or the monitor when I type, I’m a secretary after all), and thinking about how nice it will look perched on high on my top shelf of my new desk.
My mother’s Christmas gift arrived a day early (which would have been yesterday) so I can relate here what it was/is: a holly berry plant in a ceramic pot. So theoretically she can enjoy this plant again next Christmas. I gave her a balsam fir once with that same thought in mind. But the tree died. Let’s hope the holly berry plant fares better.
My blue pine, George Bailey, seems rather happy still. He’s sitting on my altar decorated with snowflakes and a rocking horse and I’m keeping his soil moist and his needles are very green and not falling off or anything, so I’m thinking this is good. Christmas Eve he’s going to come out into the living room to sit atop the coffee table (or maybe the dining room table) and all the presents will be spread around him (since there really isn’t any “underneath” him because he’s so small and wee).
Tommy’s gifts (sans stocking stuffers) will number 4. This doesn’t include the digital camera. These four gifts are, for the most part, humble, but then the digital camera was the main present anyway. I’m keeping back one for Christmas morning (plus his stocking) so there will be things to unwrap while we’re sipping Café du Monde coffee liberally dosed with Bailey’s.
The chopped sirloin is unthawing ready to be shaped into Mina’s Meatloaf for tomorrow night’s feast. I’ve also got a ten pound turkey unthawing for the Yule Feast the Pylon is having Saturday night. That turkey is rock solid, so I’m hoping four days is enough thaw time. Otherwise, I might be making yet another Mina’s Meatloaf Saturday night.
I gave out my office Christmas presents this morning. This year I gave Ghirardelli hot chocolate (in big canisters), tea from PJs and Hallmark Christmas mugs. I paired the white chocolate and the mugs for my two bosses and the dark chocolate and the tea for the other secretary and a co-worker. The two that were here today to open their gifts seemed genuinely pleased with them. But then, who can resist Ghirardelli chocolate in whatever form it comes?
My boss let me leave early yesterday – around 4 – so I stopped at the Hallmark store to get wrapping paper, gift bags, tissue paper, and the mugs. I was pissed because they wanted 89 cents apiece for bows and 25 cents apiece for tags so I’m just going to get that shit at Schwinn Pixie. I probably bought two much wrapping paper, but there’s always next year. This is really just a tiny Hallmark store, not a real one. They make the charge card slips out by hand and the cash register is manned by two old grandmas who barely know how to get out of their own way.
This reminds me that I went there for Halloween cards and they wouldn’t let me use my charge card for a charge less than 10 bucks and so I bought a Christmas CD. But I have yet to listen to this CD because I forgot I bought it. This is my official reminder to check through my CD racks to find the damn thing. I could use another Christmas CD since I have only two lounge-music renditions of the classics. I used to have Bing Crosby, Harry Connick, Jr. AND the South Park Christmas Carols, but, alas and alack, and a hearty God Damn It, God Damn It, Everyone, I left them at John’s one Christmas and that rat bastard actually packed them up and brought them to Houston with him. And then when I asked for them back before he moved to England, he said, “Oh, yeah, remind me before you leave and I’ll get them” and of course I didn’t remember – which was part of his Master Plan – and so now HE’S in England listening to Cartman sing, “Swiss Colony Beef Log” and I’m stuck listening to the same two CDs over and over again. (And over.)
And it’s not like he’s quiet about it either. He loves to tell me around Christmas about how he’s listening to Bing sing “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” as he sips his Starbuck’s Christmas Blend.
I’m not bitter or anything. No, not me.
Actually, I’m glad he has the CDs because they are part of a special era. The Bing Crosby Christmas CD I bought through my music club back when I lived in Connecticut and the Harry Connick, Jr. CD was bought the first Christmas at Magazine Street because Harry’s a local New Orleans boy. The South Park Christmas CD, well, that came from the second Magazine Street Christmas.
Tommy’s supposed to download my favorite South Park Carols from the Internet soon.
I love “Christmas Time in Hell” by Satan and the “Carol of the Bells” by Mr. Mackay, and “Merry F’ing Christmas” by Mr. Garrison and the dreidel song by the kids (“Courtney Cox, I love you, you’re so hot in that show…”), and “O, Holy Night” by Cartman, (“Down, on your nyahs”) and my ultimate favorite, “Swiss Colony Beef Log”!
They played the musical version of “O, Holy Night” at the carousel when we went to Celebration in the Oaks this year and Tommy and I were cracking up badly singing the lyrics in our Cartman voices.
You know, Thomas, if you happen to strolling through Virgin tomorrow on your annual Christmas Eve Shopathon, and you just happen to see the South Park Christmas CD, well, er, um, uh….you know!
I’m hoping John does listen to Bing, Harry and the South Park crew on Christmas Day as he sips his Bailey’s and coffee and opens any presents he hasn’t already ferreted out and ripped open already! Enjoy, sweetie!
Oh, and it’s John's birthday today. He’s taking the day off of work and playing with his Nintendo Game Cube. He might even be listening to Christmas CDs and thinking, “Ha! Bing and Harry and Cartman, you are mine! All MINE!” Or maybe not. Anyway, Happy Birthday, Jawhn!
I think I’ve rambled on far long enough for this day before the day before Christmas, so goodbye,
Until next time,
Olrun
